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The complicated role of paternal grandparents with grandchildren in a divorce

The complicated role of paternal grandparents with grandchildren in a divorce


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Divorces are situations that upset the whole family. Not only the most direct, the spouses who cease to be, and their children, but it also affects the political families that are formed with the union.

From that moment, everything changes, customs and traditions, family celebrations, holidays. If there are also children involved in that divorce, the situation becomes more complicated.

On those occasions when mothers take custody of children, not only can there be complicated situations with the father. Sometimes paternal grandparents are not in a good situation in a divorce case.

The daily life of paternal grandparents is also affected by the divorce of their son, the family is broken for everyone. For them, family reunions and events will also be affected, which will turn 180 degrees when the family is fractured.

Paternal grandparents are in the dilemma of how to help their child in this painful situation, hesitating between supporting him even if he does not ask for help or staying on the sidelines and waiting for his son to ask for their support.

Paternal grandparents may wonder if it is better for their child to give their opinion on what happened, or is it better to stay out of the way and avoid making value judgments about the divorce?

They may support your child even though they believe the weight of the breakup is their fault, or they may understand that your child is not responsible for the divorce.

Another question that paternal grandparents may ask themselves when their child divorces is whether they can continue to have contact with their ex-daughter-in-law after the separation. Would it bother your child? And would your daughter-in-law want to continue to have contact with her in-laws once her relationship with her son has dissolved?

If there are children as a result of that relationship, the paternal grandparentsthey may fear missing out on opportunities to enjoy time with their grandchildren when the family broke up after the divorce. A relationship that of grandparents and grandchildren will also undoubtedly be affected by the breakup. What can they do?

- Focus your support on the grandchildren, trying not to interfere in the relationship between their parents, giving all the understanding and help they need.

- Help grandchildren to understand that they are not responsible for the separation of parents.

- Maintain constant contact and be there whenever they need it, fostering communication and trust.

- Never give opinions to children about the separation of their parents and, much less, take a position on the side of their child by criticizing the mother.

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